Trishasmay.com

I know, I know. Good of me to write. Finally. For some reason I have a hard time blogging online. Mostly cause people can see everything. Not so much into that. Life has been stressful…….
But it’s my blog. My whinning spot. So I’m going to start to use it as that.
There are some people in this world I just don’t get. Really don’t. Good thing that’s not my job.
It’s really hard to be compassionate to someone who’s just a PISS ANT!!!! I’m sure there going though something hard in there life. Or at least they better. OK, That was my vent.
So I’m signing off. A person on a her journey experiancing a bump in the road.

Life is short thats way a hundred years seems like forever, but to God it’s a nap.
When eternity is in perspective time just takes time.

Being honest I get torn to shreads. Decieved into hurting someone else. What price is that worth? This is a war you can’t win. Cause the dictator who starts is doesn’t have a heart. Maybe it’s torn beyond shreads too. Or just simply doesn’t beat. I can’t see truth in any of it. I went missing the minute I told the truth. Nobody what’s to find it. Content with lieing and calling me a liar. One thing I do know that God loves me, Christ died for me, is alive for me. So that settles it. God knows my heart. I didn’t lie. That’s all that matters.

To be in perfect balance. Does thath mean no worry or stress? No uncertainty.. If so my balance is off. The dizziness, spots, my blurry vision . What does that have to do with balance.
I think balance teaters.
conscience to unconscience
sane to insane
beautiful to ugly
start to stupid
knowing to unknown
Balance is God on the teater totter with me only he’s holding both sides while I’m in the middle.

Hey!!!! Nothing to exciting going on right now. Just life..
Have not blogged in awhile. So I thought. Heck.. Why not.
I’m anxious cause I’m waiting to go to a birthday party. I’m excited! My husband’s so excited he’s taking a nap. I don’t want to wake him just yet so. Here I am.
Blahaaaa, blahaaaa. Its’ about time, but not yet…..
I hope everyone has a good weekend.

That was BEAUTIFUL.

I’m willing to say I not a genius cause of a little insanity, but that wouldn’t be a good perspective. Now would it.

Today I discovered that it’s okay to be different, cause that maybe what the genius is in you.

I can do anything in my dreams. Like flying, I don’t mean in an airplane or being a pilot. More like Harry Potter style. Exept I can do it without a broom. HA! HA!! I go to wonderful places and even dream I’m an actress working with George Clooney, Leonardo DeCaprio, and Johnny Depp. Of coarse I’m the leading lady. It was some kind of western or period piece. Did I mention I won an oscar. Had an exeptiance speech…. I’d like to thank God and my Momma… so on and so forth.
Pretty much what I’m saying is I can do anything. And nobody can stop me. Not even the scary blue man in my dreams. If I reconize my surroundings in a nightmare or even a dream. I realize it’s a dream and can stop it. I take the moment and say no this is my dream you can’t scare me or I’m more in the mood to be in Hawaii.
Now, I need to learn to cease a moment. Take it. Claim what is mine that second I realize I am in control of my thoughts. It my take a thousand times to try. I can do it.
This is what I must do with my life take a nightmare and turn it to a wonderful dream.( Now people I know reality is alittle different them a Hollywood movie.) But I’m trying to make a point.
Cause that’s what life is a fun, beautiful, exciting, drama filled. A movie starring me for my life anyway. If my creator, God, thinks I can be a star in a masterpiece. Then I best start being a star.

Just because you try it doesn’t mean anything in someone elses eyes. You’re never good enough. Strong enough, loving enough, or caring enough.
All it takes is one bad comment weither it’s true or not for me to crumble. Do I not like myself that much? To worry or have my heart broke off on one persons thought. Why does it matter anyway? It doesn’t make since in my head , but my heart feels the sting. Seriously, What is that?
I have to close my eyes a breathe, let it go. God, help me not hurt. Please just make this moment go away. Maybe this will get easier. Maybe, the pain will stop. Just maybe believing in myself is something I can do. Quit being so hard on yourself. God knows I’m trying that’s what counts. For know Jesus.. Please don’t let me cry. Just let me breathe.

My toe has a hole.
It lost it’s toenail.
I cried over it.. It’s all soar.
My toe with a hole in it.
You don’t realize how you miss the toenail.
The firmness of the nail. How it looked good with paint on it.
I hope you grow back toenail you are loved…
By my left foot second toe on the left.
So PLEASE!!!!
By the grace of God.
Come back.